I have very many mixed feelings right now...

I am in a glass case of emotions. Or more like an Ipod full of emotions. More than usual my songs are influencing my moods and making me more or less sad... ish I guess... I just have no idea how to express my feelings, be they happy or sad. But I must be going crazy cause I have now been listening to Disney songs on repeat for the past 2 days. But you know what, it makes me happy and that should be enough for people. (Apparently I am gonna ramble about this now...)
So if you guys are still in touch with what has been happening in my boring little life, I went on a camping trip with my school last weekend! It was really fun, but not much happened. The only thing I do want to talk about is that around 1 AM in our tent on the freezing ground, my friend and I started talking. We were talking about the most stupid things, but it felt nice to talk about all this randomness and get the stupidest things off my chest. Stuff from like my friends from 5 years ago, my thoughts on moving, my thoughts on our new teachers. The stupidest things ever. Yet just talking about them made me feel happy. Just laughing silently in my tent, not worrying about anything, it made me feel very happy and it made me feel relaxed. Now this is telling you that happy thoughts will make me happy, you following pretty well so far? Well it gets harder to follow.

I was watching Glee, like always I mean no surprise there, and Somewhere Only We Know came on, and I usually tear up at the song, but seeing the scene now, and having all this extra information about season 3, I was in a very emotional state, and I was just kinda crying in my bed... Not like hardcore crying, like sobbing, but I had tears streaming down my face. The only thing was that I was smiling. And no I am not some freak that enjoys being sad, but I think that I was truly crying tears of joy. I wish I could explain to you people who may or may not care, and I wish every analysis that I have made with my friend about them I could just copy and paste onto here, but sadly I cannot. So I shall not bore you with details that you will probably not understand, but I will say this. Kurt and Blaine's relationship is not a normal one, yet it is not an impossible one to attain. It is in fact an actual human relationship, it's just that I guess most young people have not had a chance to experience it yet. Their relationship gives me hope for so many things, namely romance and acceptance. And they stand for so much more than just an adorable couple, they stand for young people all over the world. They mean so much to me, and as you know, that actors have inspired me so much, in countless ways. SO to bring this little paragraoh to an end, crying also made me feel happy. It was like unbottling all of my emotions, and I actually usually laugh until I cry, because I believe it is the best of both worlds.
But seriously, aren't they the cutest couple ever?
And I honestly don't really care what people think of my love for them. I mean, I do care that you have an opinion, but this year I really want to let others know that what they say can only affect me positively. And I think that I am done on this subject.

Now onto expressing my true self, I have Starkid to thank! They have brought out the inner fan in me and I can honestly say that I have never felt this happy overall and this excited about the littlest things! I mean I just ordered my Starkid shirt and I am dying of excitement! I mean, I feel like they could very possibly be the best friends ever! And so to conclude this pointless and not too straightforward post, I am in love with the new me; and I hope you guys are too! If not, then... yeah.

To anyone who still follows my blog, thank you so much for bearing with me in this awkward phase. I will probably post more now because I am on break but tomorrow I am on a plane all day so I shall be busy! Ill see you guys from America!!! And once again thank you guys!!

xoxoxo,
loulou